Promise Me Tomorrow
by Yuugi Motoh
Summary: A conversation between a spirit and his light-- Yami's point of view (meant to be read before


PROMISE ME TOMORROW  
a Yu-Gi-Oh fanfiction by Yuugi Motoh (yuugimotoh@aol.com)  
  
DISCLAIMER: the author of this story does not own any of the characters featured herein. This is written as a non-profit fan fiction and is not intended to infringe on the copyrights of Kazuki Takahasi (creator of Yu-Gi-Oh!), UpperDeck, 4Kids, Shonen Jump, or any and all other entities connected with the card game, anime, or manga.   
  
TIMELINE: this takes place somewhere during the "Battle City" arc, when the Rare Hunters are still after Yugi Moto and his friends. If there are any inconsistencies, the author apologizes in advance. (I've only been watching for 2 months) The American names/spellings will be used for the most part, since that's what I'm most familiar with. It's also my first Yu-Gi-Oh songfic, so bear with me. Arigato.  
  
=================================  
_  
(There's life underground)   
I feel it all around I feel it in my bones   
My life is on the line when I'm away from home   
When I step out the door the jungle is alive   
I do not trust my ears I don't believe my eyes   
I will not fall in love I cannot risk the bet   
Cause hearts are fragile toys so easy to forget   
_  
He's still awake.  
  
I can't help but notice that. I suppose I could simply walk deeper and ignore it. There are no doors to our rooms (except when we want there to be) and the young one doesn't often close his mind against me. The times that he does, I respect his need to have his thoughts to himself, just as he never comes into my room without letting me know he's there. Which is just as well. There are passages here even I hesitate to explore, even though I know someday I'll have to. And he's only just discovered he can make his way into my mind, just as I've always been able to make my way into his. But normally he leaves me free passage.   
  
That in itself is a sign of trust... a trust sometimes I'm not sure I deserve. He trusts me not to judge him, not to deliberately lay bare his secrets. And we all have them; we all have them. There's no one that can say they'd be able to face complete and utter honesty without flinching. If I'm not afraid of it, it's because most of my memories lie hidden even from me. So how can I fear what I don't know?  
  
Hm. Perhaps that should make me MORE afraid.  
  
This isn't about me, however. It's about him. Could it be the dreams? I know he's had nightmares recently. Who wouldn't, flung head-long into a battle that began 5,000 years ago. Until now his life was normal, as normal as this century is. Now he finds himself caught in the jaws of fate. He doesn't complain, though. A little like me, in that regard; he keeps his sorrows and fears inside. He thinks he's managed to conceal them from me. If nothing else came through, however, that would, the all-consuming fear that fills a nightmare. That much I remember; even if I don't remember my own nightmares, even if I no longer sleep (or dream) I do remember that. The terror that defies reason. No wonder people used to believe that nightmares must come from some monster influencing the mind. Surely our own minds could never hold that much horror.  
  
So we say, to comfort ourselves in the night.  
  
I know better.  
  
  
_It's just another day there's murder in the air   
It drags me when I walk I smell it everywhere   
It's just another day where people cling to light   
To drive away the fear that comes with every night   
  
_  
I should leave him to confront this on his own. We both know we have to face our fears to defeat them. But he's so young. I don't care how many years he carries; he's so YOUNG. Somehow the world has come and gone around him and not stolen his innocent heart. Is it that? Is that what makes me care about what happens to him so deeply? It's more than just the bond between us that began when he set me free, I know that. I don't just want to help him. I want to protect him, guide him, teach him; catch him when he falters and set him on his feet again. He can be strong for others, but he hasn't quite learned yet how to be strong for himself.  
  
I may be doing him more harm than good in supplying that missing strength. I don't want him to become too dependent on me. I never know when I may be taken from him. I am the King of Games, but I'm not a god. I can make mistakes. There may come a time when my skill fails me... fails us. Then he may have to stand or fall on his own. (Which is a thought I don't want to be having at this point. Not when we are both hunter and hunted.) I've only failed him once before..  
  
I only wanted to help him then too. And I prove myself right with that thought; I can make mistakes. I would've let Kaiba go merrily to his death, since he was fool enough to threaten it; to my mind, if someone wishes to risk it all, then they must be prepared to pay it all.   
  
But this little one of mine, my light... he was strong then. Stronger than me. He forced control out of my grip and called back the final blow. Astonished? Yes. Angry? A bit. Proud?.... Oh yes.  
  
And ashamed?  
  
...Yes. Beyond anything I truly never meant to frighten him. Yet I did. He was afraid of me, what I might do, so much so that he almost wouldn't let me help him again. If he hadn't taken Mai's advice and faced his fear, we wouldn't be here now.  
  
No... no. I can't leave him to face this alone. So I go to him.   
  
  
_It's just another  
It's just another day   
It's just another  
It's just another day  
  
It's just another day  
when people wake from dreams   
With voices in their ears  
That will not go away   
  
_  
--Are you all right, I ask.  
  
He nods, one hand dragging over his forehead, the other holding the Millenium Puzzle. --Yeah, I'm ok. I just can't sleep. Too hot tonight or something. I'm sorry if I disturbed you.   
  
--Would you like to talk about it?  
  
Violet eyes (the exact shade of mine) look up at me, then he nods. --Can we?  
  
Perhaps it isn't seemly in this age, but I don't care. I sit on the bed beside him and hold out my arms. He doesn't hesitate to accept and curl up against me, arms around my ribs. Foolishness; people have become so wary of touching one another that they no longer believe a simple hug can mean nothing more than a wish to comfort someone you care about. This is no invitation to a lover's intimacy, no implication of desire, only reassurance given... and taken, yes. I'll admit to that. The world is larger than I remember it, but people's hearts have grown smaller and more suspicious. I'm not sure I like the exchange much. Still, it's not something I need concern myself with at this point.  
  
--So why ARE you still awake. It's nearly two in the morning.   
  
--I know. I just... I feel stupid. I'm too old to act like this. I'm not a little kid anymore. I shouldn't be jumping at shadows.  
  
--Fear seldom respects age. And, oh yes, I see that you are an ancient man, how could I miss the white hair and wrinkles. Indeed you are a sage, wise elder. I bow to your whole decade and a half of wisdom.  
  
He laughs and pounds my chest. --Stop that!  
  
--It made you feel better though.  
  
A shy smile. --Yeah. Thanks.  
  
  
_I had a dream last night the world was set on fire   
And everywhere I ran there wasn't any water   
The temperature increased the sky was crimson red   
The clouds turned into smoke and everyone was dead  
  
But there's a smile on my face  
For everyone   
There's a golden coin   
That reflects the sun   
There's a lonely place  
That's always cold   
There's a place in the stars  
For when you get old _  
  
  
We sit for a while, not speaking. The city is quiet now, its lights reflecting off the clouds and filling them with a red glow, as if in the distant skies above fires lay banked, waiting to burst into flame. The cities I remember so dimly were never lit like this. The night closed in and wrapped us in a mantle of stars. I'm not entirely content to trade that for this, but I can acknowledge a certain beauty in the idea of driving back the night. A certain beauty, and a certain irony, considering that may be the very task we've been set to. Driving back the night of destruction, the endless dark despair Malik would bring to every city on every continent if he succeeds in his mad ideals.  
  
At last the young one draws back a little, enough to meet my gaze. --I'm just worrying too much to get to sleep.  
  
--The Rare Hunters again?  
  
--Those... and everything. It just gets going around and around in my head. Why am I the 'Chosen One'? Is it just because I put the Puzzle together? And what am I supposed to do? What're WE supposed to do? How can I help you when neither one of us really knows what's going on? It's like some crazy tug of war, only we're the rope. I'm SCARED. Scared of something happening to my friends, to Grandpa... scared I'm going to let you down somehow.  
  
--You haven't yet.  
  
--But what if I DO?!  
  
--Friends stand by each other in everything, you know, and face their fears together. You SHOULD know. You're the one that taught me that. Primarily by shoving me out on a sidewalk with Téa standing in front of me.  
  
He giggles. --Well, I couldn't exactly TELL you I wanted you to talk with her, cause you might've chickened out on me. And I really did think talking with her would help. It always helps me think better. It was all I knew to do.  
  
--It did help. Even though it opened up more questions at least it pointed us in the right direction. And there was more to it than that, now wasn't there.  
  
--Ummmm I don't know what you mean.  
  
--My light, do you REALLY think you can lie to me?  
  
He ducks his head. --Guess not. Busted, huh?  
  
--As 'busted' as 'busted' can be.  
  
A pause, then, --She really does like you you know.  
  
--And you?  
  
--I don't like you!! Uh, I mean, I DO like you, but NOT LIKE THAT!  
  
I can't help but laugh. --I know. I meant, what about you. What do YOU feel about Téa?  
  
His face turns pink. --She's... she's the greatest. But I really... you know... I don't think she thinks of me like that. I wish she did... but if she doesn't... it's okay. I don't mind. I can't mind... not when it's you.  
  
So wistful, those words. I can't deny that Téa... is very interesting. I haven't missed how she acts around me. They've all begun to sense the change when I'm using the body, to recognize me for who I am, but she was the first to think that perhaps there was another spirit residing here, another soul besides that of her childhood friend. She is wise, and caring, and determined, which suits me. There again, though, is something I haven't got time to think about at the moment.   
  
My light's words also bother me, however, and so I ask: --Am I more important than you then?  
  
--You are to me. I don't understand it, but... you just are. I'd do anything. Even...  
  
I hold him tighter, then, remembering first Pegasus, and then Malik's first attack. Both times it could've been the end of him, but he wouldn't abandon me. --Even risk your life.   
  
--Yeah. I guess..... I guess I love you. That's the only word that fits, but it's so much bigger than that, the way I feel. It's like you're part of me. A part I forgot I had. When you're with me, I still feel scared, or nervous, or mad, but at the same time I feel like I can get past it all if I have to, because you're there. I, I... I don't know what I'd do if I woke up one day and you weren't there any more.   
  
--You would go on without me. You're strong enough to do that. You're so much stronger than you give yourself credit for. You got along without me for 15 years. And you matter every bit as much as I do. We're partners, remember?  
  
--I remember. Still doesn't mean I want to be without you. It's funny; you'd think I'd feel, well, crowded. But it's just not like that. It's still my hands, my eyes, my feelings; you don't take anything away from me. I don't feel like I'm missing out, or giving up part of my life. Even that crack Malik made about my being just your vessel... that didn't bother me nearly as much as the thought of him getting his hands on my Puzzle and doing something to you. I'm not ABOUT to let him get his way.   
  
--I understand what you're trying to say. You only echo my own feelings. I can't explain them any more than you can, but the thought of losing contact with you is something I would do almost anything to avoid. ALMOST.  
  
He looks up solemnly. --I understand. I wouldn't want you to either.  
  
--Never again. Not if I can find ANY other way around it that doesn't call for sacrificing the lives of others. Because you know Malik may not leave us the option of a better way. He hasn't given us any evidence that HE means to hesitate. Assuming the absolute worst happens, if he didn't kill you while he was trying to win the Puzzle, he'd certainly send you to worse than death.   
  
--I don't like it...  
  
--I don't have much taste for it myself. But there is a difference between us; I can see there may come a time when there's need for it. You can't. Don't misunderstand me, I'm not saying that my way is right and yours is wrong. In this case you're more forgiving than I am, and it takes a great deal to forgive. All I'm saying is that we may not be given the choice of forgiveness. If nothing else, though... if nothing else at all... you know that way, that choice, will never come lightly. That's the difference between us and Malik. He perceives nothing wrong with using someone up and throwing them away. Any life other than his own matters nothing to him at all. We value any life, even those of our enemies, as much as we value our own.  
  
--But we have to, don't we? I mean, if we start thinking they don't matter as much, what stops us from thinking that other people don't matter either?  
  
--Exactly. A human life shouldn't be thrown away. But sometimes a life must pay for a life, or buy it rather. You'd give your life to save me; I'd give mine-- if you can call my existence 'life'-- for you. We'd both give our lives for our friends. And if it came to the choice of a friend's life or an enemy's...  
  
--Can we talk about something else? You're right, I know, but... I can't... I can't make that choice. It's just not something I can face.  
  
--I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to turn this into a debate.  
  
--S'okay.  
  
--Do you think you can sleep now? You need to rest. Tomorrow is another day of the tournament.  
  
He's silent a moment. --Will... you stay with me a little while longer? Just till I'm asleep?  
  
--I can do better than that.  
  
He's very light. But then he's only the size of a child, and as a spirit I never grow tired. I can't touch anything else; even if I'd emerged to help him in the burning warehouse I couldn't have gotten him out. Outside the body we share, I have no power to be felt or seen or heard in the material world except to him and by him. But this much I can do. It's easy enough to pick him up and hold him in my arms, as a father would hold his son. He blinks a little, surprised, then curls up, resting his head on my shoulder. I find myself beginning to hum a half-remembered tune, a lullaby I heard from someone once perhaps. My mother? I don't know. All I know is the song sounds right. Soon enough I feel him relax, but I don't let go.   
  
He is precious to me, in so many ways. My second chance at life; my friend, my conscience, my companion in times of trouble and times of leisure both. I see the world through his eyes and find faith in it again.  
  
Perhaps that's the answer to why I care about you so much, Yugi. Because I need you every bit as much as you need me. And I will be with you for as long as I can. It isn't over, this struggle with Malik, this desperate search for the truth of my past... but we will hold onto one another for as long as we can. Fate isn't always fair, but sometimes it can be kind.  
  
So I will pray tonight, as I hold you, to the gods of ancient Egypt, in the hopes that they still hear. I'll pray for wisdom, I'll pray for courage for us all in the war to come.  
  
Most of all I will ask for one thing: if all you can promise me is a day, Great Ra, then promise me tomorrow.  
  
Promise me just another day.  
  
  
_There's razors in my bed that come out late at night   
They always disappear before the morning light   
I'm dreaming again of life underground   
It doesn't ever move, it doesn't make a sound   
And just when I think that things are in their place   
The heavens are secure--the whole thing explodes in my face   
  
It's just another  
It's just another day   
It's just another  
It's just another day  
It's just another, just another, just another day...  
_ --'Just Another Day', Oingo Boingo  
  



End file.
